Difficult People Are Part of the Job

Let’s be honest…difficult people are inevitable. And that’s especially the case in real estate where emotions run high, decisions are deeply personal, and expectations don’t always line up with reality.

We all know that for our clients, buying or selling a home isn’t just a transaction. It’s a moment loaded with pressure, hope, fear, and often a fair bit of ego.

Add money into the mix and things can escalate quickly.

Sometimes, people simply won’t want to hear what you have to say. They want the price their neighbour achieved, even though the market has shifted. They want certainty in a process that doesn’t offer it. They want yesterday’s outcome in today’s conditions.

And when that doesn’t happen, the frustration often lands squarely on the agent.

Why the agent often wears it

A buyer misses out. They blame the agent. A seller doesn’t get their dream price. They blame the agent. An owner won’t adjust expectations. They blame the agent. A deal cools off. Everyone blames the agent.

You get the picture. If you’ve been in the game long enough, you’ve been there too.

People tend to forget that we actually sit in the middle. We’re the buffer between emotion and logic, expectation and reality. We’re not the villain, but we’re often the most visible target when things don’t go to plan.

And while it’s easy to say “don’t take it personally”, in the moment it can still sting, especially when you know you’ve done everything right.

When pressure increases, so does emotion

Here’s a reality we don’t often talk about or appreciate in this industry; when business is active, you’re dealing with more people, more conversations, more moving parts, and far more emotion.

Eventually, your number comes up. It is quite simply your turn to deal with someone having a bad day, a bad outcome, or unrealistic expectations.

No agent is immune to this. No matter how much experience they have, how successful they are or how esteemed their reputation.

Even the best operators cop it from time to time. The difference isn’t whether it happens, it’s how you handle it when it does.

How to not take it personally

When you’re bearing the brunt of the blame, the first thing is to slow yourself down.

Emotion feeds on speed, but calm lives in space. A pause before responding gives you back control, even when the other person is trying to take it away.

Next, separate the message from the delivery. Often what’s being said isn’t actually about you. It’s disappointment, fear, or stress coming out sideways, and you just happen to be the closest outlet.

It also helps to anchor back to facts. You didn’t create the market. You didn’t control another buyer’s budget. You didn’t set their neighbour’s sale conditions.

And finally, protect your energy.

Not every comment deserves a response. Not every reaction needs your attention. And not every client gets access to your emotional bandwidth.

Stay professional, protect yourself

My own coping mechanism is simple.

I take the hit. I breathe. I remind myself that this too shall pass.

I’ve dealt with their type before, and I’ll deal with another one again. They might take a small slice of my attention today, but never tomorrow or long term.

Because the better you get at managing emotional chaos, the calmer and more confident you become, and that confidence allows you to focus on the clients you actually want to work with.

So, if today you cross paths with someone difficult, be the calm in the storm.

Be the professional they remember for how you handled it, not how they behaved.

That’s real skill. That’s real leadership. That’s real estate.

About the Author

Manos Findikakis is the CEO of Agents’Agency, Australia’s first multi-brand real estate network, ‘the only fully integrated solution for you and your people to create an unforgettable experience.’

For all enquiries and more information on how the Agents’Agency can help you take your career to the next level, click here to get in touch.